Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
now i know why i became what i already was.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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