i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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