I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
