Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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