you mean i was at the winter classic?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Randomize
