4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
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