WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
