ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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