Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
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