this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
