how can u be prego again
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Say something about gay babies.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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