yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
