...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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