the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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