Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
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