I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Randomize