The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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