i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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