i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her