rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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