...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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