brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
