Will you blow on my dice?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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