You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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