Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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