I wish life had little blips of pornography
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
