I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
