so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Couch. On fire.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize