what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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