You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
