This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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