What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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