They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize