Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Of course I have a pirate flag
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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