this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
