marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
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