I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
