wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous