My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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