You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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