I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Pants are for mortals
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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