Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
