How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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