so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
