A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
