im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Randomize