Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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