I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
They took my balls.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize