I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
