The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
